Friday, April 24, 2009

The Oatmeal Stand, The Turd and my PMS

First off when I say the "turd" I'm not talking about one of my kids-this time. There was actually a real piece of poop. I know the anticipation is killing you, where was it you are wondering?! Well, it was on the shelf by the changing table. I found it there this morning when I was laying out the baby outfits. It was all covered in baby powder and kinda looked like a Mexican Wedding cookie. But no it was poop, had it been a cookie I would have eaten it. I can only assume that somebody(not me) changed a diaper and lay the diaper on the shelf, this happens a lot and when it's a diaper changer of the male species they often leave the diaper there for me to come along and dispose of. So I probably picked up the diaper last night and the cookie-poop rolled out and lay on the shelf overnight. What a wonderful way to start to my morning.

I don't feel well today, I have PMS or PMDD or whatever. I just want to put a sign on my neck that says "leave the alone or else". I used to think it was really lame when the girls in gym class got a note to skip p.e. because of cramps. What? Just deal with it and take some Tylenol like I do. Well, 25 years later I want my note!!! I want excused for the day, and tomorrow too. I want to go to bed and eat ice cream and sleep! Tylenol doesn't work for what I have. I eat Midol like it's candy just to stay awake and keep from ripping somebody's head off. I can feel it on my face, it must look like I am pissed. I am smiling while I sing and play with the babies and pretend that things like poop don't bother me. I crave chocolate. I am bloated. I am exhausted. I asked my Dr. about it and he gave me Lexapro last year. I couldn't remember to take it so I quit. I need something that I can take on these few days before my period-no I won't drink while I am in charge of the littles, any other suggestions?

The picture you see might look like a smashed up empty diaper wipes container. Don't be fooled. It's clearly an oatmeal stand. Considering my previously mentioned mood and the fact that I am really not supposed to be lifting all the babies yet. I decided to make instant oatmeal and feed it to them from the living room chair. No messy hands/no lifting and no cleaning of the highchair trays! It worked out pretty good except for the brawl over the "oatmeal stand" apparently oatmeal tastes much better if you eat it while elevated on a stand and smoosh yourself in the armpit of the person spooning it out. Who knew?

I think I smell a batch of Mexican wedding cookies brewing so I better go for now.

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